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The second behavior that predicts divorce with over 90 accuracy according to john gottmans research and the experience of most couples counselors is stonewalling different from an occasional . Valentines day is just around the corner so what better time to consider the status of modern relationships in the uk with valentines day spending set to exceed gbp1 billion in the uk after rising incrementally for the last two years it would initially appear as though there are a healthy number of loving and contented relationships nationwide. How to ruin a perfectly good relationship patricia love sunny shulkin colleen beaumont on amazoncom free shipping on qualifying offers a laugh inspiring book chockfull of the kind of gotchas that contain serious lessons just beneath the surface pat love and sunny shulkin hold up a big fun house mirror to the kind of relationship behavior most of us are guilty of. You ruin a perfectly good relationship by failing to trust your partner at midnight when she or he is at a party without you you ruin it by snooping in their phone always wondering if they will find someone better than you you ruin a perfectly good relationship by naively thinking that this person will stay with you no matter what you do or say. Before we gained love sense it was hard to offer an incisive explanation for how love fails theories that concentrate on bad behavior and lack of communication skills focus on the symptoms of couple distress rather than the root cause the overwhelming fear of being emotionally abandoned set adrift in the sea of life without safe harbor